What are your favorite Chuck Norris facts?

A couple of mine are...

Chuck Norris makes the devil his bitch.

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

Think of a hot woman...Chuck Norris did her.

the boogey man checks under his bed for chuck norris.

Chuck Norris WTF? Walker, Texas Ranger is the shit

Chuck Norris FTW? Walker, Texas Ranger is the shit

Your not getting it huh Casey?

I guess not....Am I suppose to state a fact about him or somthing

I guess not....Am I suppose to state a fact about him or somthing

Yea, like for example...

Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends"


You know stupid things like that, basically Chuck Norris is a god of gods.

As a teenager in Italy, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convant. 9 months later they gave birth to the 72 Dolphins, the greatest football team in NFL history.

When Chuck Norris falls into the water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris'ed.

Once on the set of Walker, Chuck Norris brought a still born lamb back to life by giving it a mustache rub. A group of people began to gather and Chuck proceeded to round house kick the lamb breaking it's neck. Thus proving, that Chuck Norris giveth and Chuck Norris taketh away.

Chuck's gril friend once asked him,"How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" This angered Chuck Norris making him say," How dare you rhyme in the presence Chuck Norris" and ripped out her throat then said," Don't fuck with Chuck." Two years and 3 months later Chuck Norris realized the irony in the situation and laughed.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Vin Diesel one

When Vin Diesel was born a nursed yelled,"Hey it's Vin Diesel!" and then had sex with him. Vin Deisel has had sex 3 times before that.

LOL @ Casey! Man, you crack me up. How do you not get this? :p

I have nothing to add to this. But I really want to know HOW the Chuck Norris phenomenom began and how the hell it kept going?

Scotty

I think that it was his small small part in Dodgeball that got the CN thing going.

haha..watched that movie last night! ..and I still feel like a moron and Im too stupid to think of a good...

Jack Bauer can kick chuck norris ass!

anyways...i liked those chuck norris infomercials on tv with the all in one gym thing..ha ha

Chuck's gril friend once asked him,"How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" This angered Chuck Norris making him say," How dare you rhyme in the presence Chuck Norris" and ripped out her throat then said," Don't fuck with Chuck." Two years and 3 months later Chuck Norris realized the irony in the situation and laughed.



HAHAHAHAHAH thats great!!!!!!!!! :hail:

Did you know that behind chuck norris' beard is not a chin but another fist.

Chuck norris doesn't tea bag women he potatoe sacks them!

*still cant think of anything*!

So I give you this instead..lol

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e44/shocker4200/chucknorris.gif

lol... Good enough Case.....

Scotty